Dear Santa

Human mama says I should write to you if I want Christmas presents. She also says I have to tell you if I've been naughty or nice. I thought it was Jesus who wanted to know that, so I'm a little confused. And explain to me the part about "sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake?" Why do you care if I'm asleep or awake? I'm a cat. I sleep like a million hours a day. I don't understand. Am I supposed to be sleeping more--or less?

So, Santa, it's cold out today and the heat isn't very good in the 'part of ment. I have to follow human mama around 'cuz she's warmer than the radiators are. Can you make the stingy landlord give us more heat? Because I'm tired. I'm tired of walking around and around looking for mama (heat machine.)

What else I want is this:

I want Whistle and Fish to come and visit. We would play. It would be so much fun. Can you give them tickets please? First class? They'd have to fly unaccompanied minor but it'd be okay.

I want more string toys. I love string toys.
I want girlkitty to like me more.

I want to go to acting school. I think I'd be very good at commercials but I need some training. Oh and head shots. I need head shots, too.

Please, Santa? Pretty please with greenies on top??

Now about that good and bad thing. Well, I'm not always good, Santa, I admit it. I sometimes scratch the furniture, and wake up human mama for no known reason in the middle of the night, and I stole some earrings (but she found them so taht doesn't count.)And I still jump on my sister's head, and chew on shoes, and knock things over kind of sort of on purpose.

But I'm trying to be better.

And more importantly, I'm good, too! I give sister baths every chance I get, and I know she likes it 'cause she doesn't hiss. I let her have the extra wonderful spot behidn the couch with the pillows and near the radiator. I also never ever go into her room of her own. And I meet my human mama at the door most of the time. And I go in the litter box not anywhere else. And I clean my plate every time. And i keep my human mama company. And I have been working on my blog. And I let human mama put that horrible collar on me and take my picture. And I have never ever even once used my claws on a human or a kitty, only on furniture. And I've learned to sleep under the covers so that sister and I don't fight. And I was in 2 sermons this year as a sermon example---a good one! And I love my sister even though she doesn't love me and I love my human mama and my breath doesn't stink anymore.

That's all.

I hope you're having a nice day.

You look nice in red.

Say hi to Mrs. Claus.

Your good friend forever,
LMK